PM Experiment

The Art of Burlesque

Getting saucy with Lady Miss Iris

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Being a woman is a beautiful thing; with the bat of an eyelash and a toss of the hair, we can control a room. Females are the greatest magicians of all, with our crimson painted lips, lace push-up bras and hairsprayed curls. We create an illusion that most men can’t help but buy into. It’s a dynamic that’s as old as time.

Is it unfair of us to employ the trickery of makeup, corsets and fishnet stockings? Perhaps. But, some women also go that extra mile to work on both their Monroe-esque seductiveness and their red-hot dance moves (aka the triple threat). These adventurous, fun-loving ladies study at the Rhode Island Burlesque Academy, and I wanted in.

I arrived at Bayside School of Dance wearing a short little dress, with a bow in my hair and high wedge sandals. I already had “that illusion thing” in the bag. It was the other two factors that had me squirming with doubt: Would I be able to give myself a come-hither look in the mirror without giggling? And could I still drop it low on the dance floor without fracturing a hip?

Lady Miss Iris, a petite woman with a platinum pixie cut, greeted me at the door with a smile. She then looked down at my shoes. I was told that while we would dance in heels eventually, it was best to start off without. Sheepishly, I unbuckled my straps; with a four-inch loss of height came an intangible loss of confidence. I tried my best to hide it.

Miss Iris then introduced me to the other gals, all of whom were one step ahead of me, as I was joining in session two of her 10-week “Pour On Some Sauce” class. It had been 14 years since I’d stood in a dance studio. I told her it had been awhile, and she told me not to worry. “There are only two levels of performance in here,” she said, “sexy... and more sexy.” The other ladies nodded in agreement.

The music began. Dean Martin’s “Standing On the Corner” flooded the studio and I began mimicking the group’s movements, which were simple and easy to follow, yet – much like yoga – left me quite sore the next day. We practiced circling our hips and tracing our fingers up our bodies to the sounds of Gene Pitney and Sonny Lester. Listening to those classic tunes was almost as much fun as the dance itself.

We also learned how to radiate sensuality while not moving at all. “Posing is a transferrable skill,” Miss Iris said, as she showed us how to position our feet, legs and arms in order to look our best. “Whether you’re at the club with your girlfriends or having your photo taken at a wedding – do this [pose] and you’re going to look hot.” Oh, and when all else fails, “go into ta-da pose, and everything will be okay.” As I walked to my car, high on life and physically spent, I wondered if that wasn’t a metaphor for life.

Lady Miss Iris, I’ll be back.

confidence, burlesque, dancing, sexy, seductive, dance, bayside school of dance, lady miss iris, providence monthly

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